LIFE LESSONS I’VE LEARNT THE HARD WAY
I’ve lived over two decades of life so far and learnt a fair few life lessons. I know that no one listens to life advice (and I think that’s probably for the best – learn from your own mistakes, not other people’s) but here’s what I’ve learnt in my wise old age of
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- Not Everyone Will Like You
There will always be people who hate you, whether it’s for a particular reason or just because they don’t. Whether they’re bitching about you to their friends, making snide comments on your Facebook page or just giving you dirty looks in the street, you can’t blame yourself. Instead, just ignore those who don’t like you, cut them out of your life and just know that they are either jealous or a bad person.
- Everyone Changes
As humans, we develop and evolve as we age, go through experiences and meet new people in new surroundings. It’s just what happens and it’s the beauty of existence. I’m definitely not the same person I was even 2 years ago, and no one I know has stayed exactly the same throughout their entire lives. It would be weird if they did! We all learn things and things happen and sometimes you drift apart from people because you’re too different. That’s okay.
- You Can’t Compare Yourself To Anyone Else
Social media is totally to blame for this, but we look at other peoples’ lives and get jealous that theirs is perfect and ours is… well, not. But, on social media, people don’t share the negative parts, they only post the ‘best bits’. So you might see that someone from your hometown has just bought their first house whilst you can barely afford rent but what you don’t know is that they are struggling with paying their phone bill now they have a mortgage to pay. All you see is the good parts because people don’t want to show you the bad parts. We’re all different, so don’t compare. (This post might interest you if you want to know more about this topic).
- Existence Is Fleeting
I sound like an old person, but life is insanely quick and many people – including myself – don’t make the most of it. I don’t want to go all Shia LaBeouf on you, but if you have a dream, you just have to do it. Make it happen and worry about everything else later. You’re only here for a short time, so make your life as positive and exciting as you can possibly make it.
- Be Excellent To Each Other
It’s hard to be nice sometimes, especially if someone is being an arsehole. But if you’re civil (at least) to people you dislike, you’re going to feel a lot happier and you’ll be the bigger and better person. Negativity affects your mental health!
- Life Isn’t Fair
I sound like your mum, but life isn’t fair. Bad things will always happen to good people and good things happen to bad people. The rich get richer, there’s poverty everywhere and racism and sexism are still prevalent, and so on. It’s a bad world. But you’re not going to get anywhere without working hard and sometimes, yes, you can do all the right things and still not get anywhere but that’s life and it’s not anyone’s fault. The sooner you realise it, the better – you need to pick yourself up and try again every time something bad happens.
- Destiny Is Up To You
This is similar to the previous point, but you’ve got to control your own life. You can’t just wait for luck to hand you a winning lottery ticket and make you happy; you’ve got to make yourself happy by doing the things you like to do, growing, gaining skills, surrounding yourself with people you like – the only person who is going to make you happy is yourself. Instead of waiting for those lemons, go out and pick them yourself.
- Own Your Screw-Ups
Everyone makes mistakes and it’s a natural part of life and learning. It can be hard to admit you’ve made a mistake but it’s crucial that you do, so you can learn from them and rectify them. It makes you a much better person if you admit to a mistake and apologise and learn from it, than if you ignore it and continue to make the same mistakes. If you want to know how to own your ‘faults’, this post might be interesting!
- Your Opinion Is The Only One That Matters
So many people let the fear of other people’s opinions influence their lives. You can’t let that happen. Everyone has an opinion on everything and unless you’re being offensive, rude or just plain wrong (learn from your mistakes!), it doesn’t matter what they think because you’re the only one who matters. Take opinion on board for certain things (like constructive criticism) but don’t worry too much about it if it makes you happy. Just don’t be a bigot about it.
- Love Yourself
I’m a big believer in being positive about yourself. It’s something that I struggle with and it’s really difficult as we’re always told we should hate how we look and shouldn’t be vain, but you have to be your own champion. You should want to improve and learn to better yourself but you do need to learn to like yourself as you are as well. Ask yourself: If a friend was saying the same things to me as I say to myself, would I be their friend? My answer was no and so I’m trying so hard to be nicer to myself (and it’s difficult, I know). Life is so much happier when we love ourselves as much as we love other people.